Thursday, 31 December 2015

Good-Bye 2015

This year was the best year of my life. I repeat the best year of my entire life. This year made me say that I do not have even a single fantasy that was left unfulfilled. I tasted the joys of unlimited laughter and experienced the pleasures of the most beautiful sunsets. I learned to act to situations which were absolutely uncontrollable and I have been taught how to adjust out of my comfort zones. I faced the biggest failure of my life and experienced the embarrassment for disappointing my loved ones.
 I deliberately put myself into the situations where I found myself helplessly hopeless and I successfully reached to the point where I saw no way out other then talking to Him and seeking help. Needless to say, I found my lord the most merciful and forgiving. Besides disobeying him in every possible way, He has blessed me with countless blessings. I have been told again and again that I am immature, I am impatient, I am childish and I am a major drama queen but He says I love you 70 times more than your amma does. He accepts me the way I am and He keeps blessing me every day. I cannot even begin to thank Him for His mercy on me.
We believe that this era of technology and digital evolution has made exposure to sins quite easy, so much, so that it is nearer to impossible to stay away from 'under the cover sins.’
 Everything has two aspects if technology has given access to pornography and such stuff then we do have lectures from Noman Ali khan to watch and content from Yasmeen Mogheed to read (for example). Therefore, it is very important to realize and learn to utilize our time the right way. No wonder, it is difficult to realize things sooner rather than later and it cannot be realized by reading this or hearing someone saying such stuff. People learn from experiences. Just like I did. Nevertheless, I still put the question here for all of us, when we are going to hold ourselves to a higher standard if not today.
If I am writing this that doesn’t mean that I am practicing myself to put to a higher standard or I am very sober or religious. I have made huge mistakes in my life particularly in this year.  I have done such shameless things this year that most of the people I know cannot even think of doing them. And I am mentioning it over here to highlight that don’t judge people and their faith. We don’t know what others are up to. He is the only one who knows what our hearts hold.
We are our worst critics and we should be.  Quite a bit of our life has passed already. Lets just make a dua at the start of this year that May Allah help us all to be a better human being a better Muslim and a better person for our parents, our society and for the one who is constantly watching us and forgiving us for our sins. May Allah forgive us for all our sins we have committed in the past and shower His blessings and Mercy upon us and our families. (Ameen)

As this year ends and a New Year rolls in, I wish all of you, your near and dear ones a very happy and prosperous New Year ahead. : )

Sunday, 20 December 2015

could it get more beautiful?

She combed his annoying puff with her fingers, while his stares kept warming up her face. It was the early December morning--who says December is a month of agony and depression?

Sunday, 25 October 2015

October Twenty Fifteen

I never found myself scared of anything but October 2015 before I knew that it will going to be the life-changing month for me in a happy way.

This is something I wrote three years back, to the person who is very close to my heart. Today, I know, how does it feel when each every teeny bit of it turns into reality. I believe no other words would do justice to explain how it feels to live on cloud nine for straight 26 days!

"There are times when you feel you are the most blessed person, the happiest on earth. It's when you are so filled and complete. Your brain, floating in happy hormones. Your heart, weightless. You are sure there's nothing in the world left you'd want to wish for. No exaggeration! It's when you feel so scared at the same time too, for losing what you have at hand. You just wish to hold on to all those reasons, which brought you to this state of ecstasy, forever...... "

Thenk You isn't enough for turning the biggest failure of life into the most beautiful happening, but its all I can say, Thenk You October 2015!

Sunday, 18 October 2015

Your Eyes Are My Fantasies

Safe in those arms, close to the heart, when just a single glance hypnotizes you & you know where your heart longs to be. Holding them hands, hearing the breaths, when the gentle glow surprises you with the warmth, and you know, you cannot be any safer. Listening them beats, having the butterflies, when the spark of them takes you to another world & you know that there is nothing more beautiful than this.

…Forgetting your existence, believing in fairy tales, when their charm makes you forget all the worries that is when you know that lying under the shinning blue sky surrounded by the echoes of mountains is no more a fantasy but to own them eyes is actually the wildest fantasy you have ever had.

Wednesday, 14 October 2015

The sixteenth letter!

Never knew that I would ever write a letter to you. I wrote 15 of them to my previous employer. The first time I came to know who you are and to whom you belong to I got all teary. The more I was reading, the more tears were flowing down the cheeks. I was wishing that day to come to you and hug you for who you are but then Uzair stopped me. I started admiring you as a woman, as a mother as a wife and as a person. I have been secretly calling you my mentor, interestingly enough I don’t even know you in person but as much as I know about you, it is enough for me to idealize you.
You’re the only person, I repeat, only person about whom I’ve never heard any negative remarks from anyone around which explains itself that you’re an amazingly beautiful creature inside out. Your positive vibes have given me motivation to do better and to stay at SOS.
I don’t know what to say and how to put it in a better way but you’ll be terribly missed. I really do hate good-byes and overly charged sensitivity but all I could say is you’re genuinely beautiful on the inside as drop dead gorgeous you’re on the outside. I wish and pray that you’ll get everything that you desire for.  Thank you for being supportive, thank you for being who you are and thank you for being a listening ear!

Thursday, 8 October 2015

Wildest Fantasies Sacred Dreams & Unrealistic Happenings~Reality!

I can’t believe this, she chanted. You can’t believe what? He asked with wonder. This is happening, she replied. His eyes were staring her blushed face—Holding the fingers she loves the most, riding on them roads she witnessed the most beautiful sunset of her life!  

Tuesday, 15 September 2015

The one constant

She has stopped believing in those four letters because he doesn't believe in what they called LOVE.

Isn't the statement itself the most crazy form of love?

Wednesday, 26 August 2015

From Maryam To Maryam

Okay so.. The name due to which I had to resign from my work place, my first work place—the romance, the first love of my life! The name due to which the one of the most beautiful chapters of my life came to a terrible end (& btw I still believe the chapter was that beautiful). The name, due to which all the hopelessness, hollowness, melancholy and disappointment came into my life, majestically turned into the name, which is a life savior now—Maryam!

I used to hate a person literally HATE that person named as Maryam. Interestingly enough when I joined my current organization the first person our national director introduced to me was unfortunately or probably perhaps fortunately, of the same name—Maryam! I didn’t have the slightest hint at that time that she’ll make me forget all the darkest aspects of life.

Okay without wasting time, let me roll some clich├ęd stuff. The first time I saw her I was like what the……. I hated myself, I hated everything else, I hated her like anything. I was questioning myself, Maryam, once again Maryam eh? Seriously, seeeeeeeriously? Err. I told myself that I’ll back off and leave this place because I have had Maryam phobia.

Within less than an hour, I AM NOT EXAGGERATING, “LESS THAN AN HOUR” we were close friends so much so that some businesswoman came to visit the department and asked for how long we know each other? and we were like since an hour, we suppose. Her facial expressions were exceptional to know that. :D

And then the very next day Maryam was my best friend. She majorly owes this world an explanation for being the cutest-lamest creature. Starting from paws to cat fights. Heart to heart sessions to some serious discussions. And how can I forget the laughter attacks and SARHI BANDHNY kay new tutorial like every other day.

The movie dates, the hunger fights, the highly illogical and dumb explanations to serious shits—I mean as if she is the prism in my life to act as a spectrum, spreading the colors all around me. WOOOOT AN EXAMPLE MAYAM!

She made me forget all my regrets and bad happenings. I wasn’t aware that she’s that special to me until that day. THAT DAY. I am going to cherish that for the rest of my life. She actually made me feel fly high above the skies. I feel myself now a teenager writing my best friend’s essay but this is how it goes.

I used to doubt if I would ever be able to write something for someone with all my heart and sincerity, but she’s magical man. Here I am telling the world that this woman is incredibly beautiful :D

I can't even begin to explain how much I value and cherish her presence in my life. Each. Every. Teeny. Bit. Maryam took everything away and she being MARYAM as well brought that back adding much more to it.

To the countless boooooootiessssss waly high-fives, my stuffed turkeys, amazing happening, gut cracking laughters and many more joys to come our way, I want to thank you for turning all the bads into goods, being my highs where were lows and for turning blues into glows. Thank you for being there, thank you for bearing the tears! You be everything to my survival, my reason to stay, to smile and to laugh like retards from nine to five. *paaaaaaaaaaaw*

Monday, 3 August 2015

The Girl Whose Efforts Remained Unnoticed

She was the woman of her words. Once said, consider it done. Egoistic nerd with dirty anger. People used to get disappointed after challenging her. She was the laughing stock for everyone. Never compromising on the self-respect, she has beautifully managed to gather a pampering crew around her. Attention seeker, drama queen, magnet to troubles, machine for mood swings and what not. She was important, she was self-obsessed, a shinning diamond—A narcissist!

…& now the one who once was the woman of her words looks at the moon sometimes in the middle of the night and secretly asks the silver lining, what next!?